Wednesday, January 4, 2012

A little bit of happy, a little bit of sad...

So I wanted to explain my absence, because I feel I should.

The day before Thanksgiving the hubs and I closed on our new house.  It has been a whirlwind of unpacking and getting ready for the holidays!  It's been so fun!  We are finally in our dream home, the home we hope to spend the next 100 years of our lives in!  The home we hope to fill with children!  It's wonderful!  That's the happy!

The sad is very sad...I teach at a Lutheran school supported primarily by the church and third-party donations.  I have worked there for 8 years.  I love it.  The school and the families have been so much of my family.  I moved out to Denver right after college and all my family lives in Nebraska.  So many school families have invited me for holiday's, I'm a god mother to one of the babies born to a school family, I've babysat for families when both mom and dad have had to go away.  It's truly a family. 

The church, well, the church has been "Supportive" financially, but not without complaints about how the school spends money, the school does this, the school does that.  Well since I've been there they have had voter's meetings about 5 times to decide if they will continue to support the school financially.  December 4th, 2011 they officially voted to close our school after the 2011-2012 school year.  May 2012 will be the last month that children will be heard in our halls, the last time that students who are hurting can be safe.  It's been an emotional roller-coaster! 

Our students and their families found out the day before and day of our Christmas Program.  I had 6 students in my room crying their eyes out asking why.  All I could offer was a hug and tell them to pray hard.  Pray that the path God has for us would be shown to us.  Some of the students in my class have been at my school since preschool.  They don't know anything else.  It breaks my heart to see this happen.  But there seems to be no other way.

The reason seems so lame, we don't have the money to keep it open.  It's simple, yet I feel that more could have and should have been done.  I took over as principal in July 2010 and worked so hard to get more students & money coming in.  I held a pledge drive and raised $10,000!  That's the most that has been raised in one attempt since I began there in 2004.  I feel that when I started though I was in a hole trying desperately to climb out and every time I started to get closer to the top, someone/thing would back a dump truck up and dump the dirt on me and I had to start all over with digging out.

So the last few days of school before vacation I spent enjoying my students.  I spent the days loving them and trying my best not to cry in front of them.  They wanted to go around to all the classrooms on party day to sing Christmas Carols.  They sounded wonderful. 

I'm nervous and apprehensive of what this second semester will bring.

So I really took time off over Christmas.  My weeks were filled with so many meetings leading up to this decision.  Sometimes I would leave my house at 6 AM and not return until 8, 9, 10 PM because I had to go to church council, school board, PTL, etc.  So when Christmas Vacation came, I didn't open my computer.  I put a vacation response on my email, and I enjoyed the reason for the season.

I spent time with my husband, my family, my friends.  I clung the knowledge that what happens in this life is temporary, and I know where my salvation comes from--a loving Savior whose birth we celebrated on Christmas. 

So there you have it...my excuse...


4 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry your school is closing! Like the children, we as adults can also get so attached to a place - to a community. I started my teaching career 11 years ago at a small rural school just outside of my city, and have been there ever since. These smaller schools have such a sense of community that I've completely embraced, and would be happy to spend my entire career there.
    Best of luck to you in the New Year, and everything it brings.

    Jen
    Runde's Room

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  2. Oh, Sarah! My heart is breaking for you. I understand what you say about it being your family. As we well know, teaching in our Lutheran schools is more than just a job - it's our heart and our calling and our ministry. My prayers are indeed with you!

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  3. Sarah,

    I am so sorry to hear about you school closing. I can only imagine how upsetting and hurtful this has been for you, your students, the families, and the school community. I lost my job last year due to budget cuts in New York and the one thing that brought me peace was knowing that I did all I could, with what I had, for the time I was there. The impact that you have had on those children will last even after your school closes its doors. Wishing you a wonderful rest of the school year.

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  4. I am SO sorry to read this on your blog-- I just recently found your blog and love it!! I teach at a Catholic school and we just found out a few weeks before Christmas that we too would be closing after over 50 years of operation. I know how terrible it feels! We have worked so hard to increase enrollment and add programs to improve the school. It's been super tough on my students, many who will have to find a brand new school for their last year before high school. I will keep you in my prayers! Have the best 2nd half of the year!
    Kate
    http://tothesquareinch.wordpress.com

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